Monday, November 19, 2018

In the News

Local Man Confused By What Female Cashier’s Smile Meant

Gary Hertmann had a fairly average shopping experience at his local Mariano’s.The young female cashier, Alice Houston, had been very polite and friendly, asking him about his day.The only unusual part came after he...

Quote of the Day

I might be addicted to homework.

News In Brief

  • Roommate’s Cool Visiting Cousin Makes Roommate Look Like Total Loser
  • Res Life Reveals Plans to Replace 2018 Housing Lottery with Live Game of Survival (see SAGA/DOP for tickets)
  • Professor’s Pit Stains Reveal Image of Messiah’s Face, English 273 Becomes Religious Pilgrimage Destination
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