UIC Student Conveniently Leaves Out “I” in Facebook Post

With the start of the Spring semester comes dreaded college admissions. All across the country, high school seniors anxiously await their acceptance letters to some of the most prestigious universities in the world, while others will settle with their admission to DePaul, Columbia, or the University of Illinois at Chicago (UIC).

For those with an acceptance to the latter, the confusion of new students’ friends and family over the school’s acronym may be hard to handle, and that is what drove senior Andrew Motto to announce that he had gotten accepted to U of C rather than UIC.

“I really just accidentally left out one tiny letter,” said Motto, “They’re both in Illinois. I don’t get the big deal.”

While one school is the prestigious University of Chicago, the other is a mediocre safety school located on the Near West Side.

Motto was met with a flood of congratulations on Facebook as well as some bewilderment from his family who had always been concerned that Motto was too stupid to tie his own shoes, let alone be accepted to the third best university in the nation.

“Of course we’re happy for him,” said the student’s aunt, “but we are a little confused and frankly disappointed in the U of C admissions staff. Andrew’s cousin also got accepted, and she received a 35 on her ACT while I’m pretty sure Andrew got a 9, and that was for filling out his own name.”

Fellow UIC students have followed in Motto’s example and changed their statuses from students at UIC to U of C.

“It is a university, and it is in Chicago. So, technically, I’m not lying at all. You’re just misinterpreting.” said UIC junior, Lily Scalipo.

According to Facebook, Scalipo is a rocket science major attending the University of Chicago on a full ride.